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Tore foorum kõikidele Harry Potteri fännidele. https://hpfannid.forum.co.ee
 
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 W.C aka Winged Creatures

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Murtagh
TikaaniSaiko
Faschy .
7 posters
AutorTeade
Faschy .
Töinav hamdinger
Töinav hamdinger
Faschy .


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PostitaminePealkiri: W.C aka Winged Creatures   W.C aka Winged Creatures Icon_minitimeTeis Jan 05 2010, 23:05

ok, nii. Vaatasin, et keegi ei ole inglise keeles kirjutanud midagi. Mul on juba ammu olnud tuju midagi säärast kirjutada. Võtsin siis julguse kokku.
Jah, on küll Inglise keeles aga on piisavalt kerge, et sellest saab aru kui midagi oled õppinud. kui abi vaja siis või seletada... niiet siin ta (fantaasia tegelikult) siis on.

W.C.

1.1 Meet my big pet.

“I jump off the canyon. My life runs in front of my eyes. I see every second of my life when we were together. At the last moment, before I’m going to die by striking a rock and land to the bottom of the canyon, I make up my mind; I don’t want to end my life like that! I’m Jennie Jefferson, for god sacs! I start flying; my hands are changing to wings. I didn’t know that I could fly, but I have always wanted to realize how it feels, to be free, like a bird.”
I put my notebook onto the teachers’ desk and ran back to my seat. “Jennie that was excellent!”
“Thanks, Ms. Myer,” I said.
“Did you write it all by your self?” was my favorite teacher surprised.
“Of curse me! Who else has such great ideas?”
“Right. Whatever you write, I’m always surprised.”
Laura Myer smiled softly and gave me my diary, opened. There was written in bright red ink: Excellent work, A+.
“And you, all, who haven’t done S E L F todays homework, it must be placed on my desk tomorrow.” I smiled when teacher looked at me.
“What?” said everybody.
DRIING!
All my classmates quickly head to the break, but I wanted to talk to my literature teacher.
“Ms. Myer,” I asked for attention.
“Yes?” she noticed right away.
“I think that I’ll have to skip the next competition.”
“Oh why? Your stories are really good.”
“Sorry, it’s not my decision actually.” I said in little voice.
“Whose then?” and again I had surprised her.
“My mum, we had a little fight over my writings.”
“Yea that’s bad, my mum did it too.”
“Writing?” I asked.
“No. Not letting others write. I think that your mother is jealous of us being so good friends.”
I started thinking about it, it had a point.
“Maybe true. But yesterday she said that we’ll move if I write again. She took all my notebooks, where my stories were.”
Ms. Myers face turned blue. “Oh, that’s rude.”
“That’s my mum.” I rolled eyes.
“Let me talk to her.”
Something big and blue flew behind the window. It landed.
“I gotta go now.” So I ran out of the class, through the lighted long corridor and out of the school front door, almost. Safeguard caught me and asked:
“Where you’re going so quickly?”
“I’ll have to see...” then I caught my breath. “The doctor. I’m already late.”
“Ok. Off you go.”
Free to go, again, I started to run.
It was a sunny day. Wind was messing my hair as I ran behind my old school.
“Hey Shaggy!”
The thing stepped out behind the carbide cans, they weren’t hiding him anyway, because he was too big and bright blue.
Shaggy is a feshushi bird. He belongs to me and Brandon. Shaggy was our biology experiment, indeed we haven’t showed it to anybody, but it worked. He hatched about a year ago by now and has done a lot of growing. We really like him and having that kind of secret is no problem for us. Shaggy isn’t the only big feshushi bird that we have to share. Thanks to our perfect friendship we have made two more analogous eggs so there are two feshushi baby-birds coming on their way soon. Newborns will be named Mimi and Terry. They have to be in our lab until they hatch.
“Let’s go home.” I said to Shaggy and climbed to his back. As I crossed my hands around his feathered neck he started running and jumped up.
Shaggy was flying.

kriitikat...
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TikaaniSaiko
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TikaaniSaiko


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PostitaminePealkiri: Re: W.C aka Winged Creatures   W.C aka Winged Creatures Icon_minitimeKolm Jan 06 2010, 08:54

Haha, I used to write vampire stories in English. But I like that one. Väga rõõmus
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Faschy .
Töinav hamdinger
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Faschy .


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PostitaminePealkiri: Re: W.C aka Winged Creatures   W.C aka Winged Creatures Icon_minitimeKolm Jan 06 2010, 23:25

tuli vist lühike? 1.3 tuleb ka veel lühem ja siis tulevad pikemad ja normaalsemad. tnx.

1.2 Meet my big pet.

***

My phone started ringing and that devil woke me up. I reached for the red light which was made by my phone.
“Yes?” I sounded sleepy.
“Jen, wake up! You’ll have to come, oh my god I’m so exited. Mimi and Terry…” he prattled hastily.
“Bran, calm down! Speak slowly now, is there something wrong with Mimi or Terry?” I started worrying.
“No time, come quick, please!” he hushed and threw his phone away.
I listened to the dumb phone for a minute and then I realized what he was buzzing about. Quickly changed my clothes and hurried out of my house. I trembled for a second; it was freezing outside. I must be lucky that Brandon lives next door to me. No need for banging on the door; my best friend had already opened it. Brown haired boy rushed downstairs and I followed him though that well-memorized path. That room where those stairs led us was a place where I had been almost all of my summer holiday. White walls, stuffy shelves – you could say that it is just a lubber room or some kind of garage. Security first, we opened the door with a code. There was a big table and on it two buckets obviously filled with water. Neither of us put on the lights. We didn’t need any.
“So bright,” murmured I.
“You see my problem,” he nagged nervously.
We stood there and watched two side-by-side placed buckets shining in different colours. One red other green, as their light connected, made a yellow glow between them.
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PostitaminePealkiri: Re: W.C aka Winged Creatures   W.C aka Winged Creatures Icon_minitimeNelj Jan 07 2010, 11:14

Haha, I kinda don't get it.
Maybe I know what's going on, if they will get some magical creatures from something seemed to be... eggs? Naer
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Faschy .
Töinav hamdinger
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Faschy .


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PostitaminePealkiri: Re: W.C aka Winged Creatures   W.C aka Winged Creatures Icon_minitimeNelj Jan 07 2010, 12:01

nad on linnud ju... kooruvad munadest... ja neid on käks, seega mitmus
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PostitaminePealkiri: Re: W.C aka Winged Creatures   W.C aka Winged Creatures Icon_minitimeNelj Jan 07 2010, 18:22

Lühikesed osad, suht... mõttelage minu meelest. Vigu on ka suht palju. Just kirjavahemärkidega.
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PostitaminePealkiri: Re: W.C aka Winged Creatures   W.C aka Winged Creatures Icon_minitimeNelj Jan 07 2010, 18:31

Mõttetu. Tegevustik on igav.
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PostitaminePealkiri: Re: W.C aka Winged Creatures   W.C aka Winged Creatures Icon_minitimeNelj Jan 07 2010, 19:19

Ma võin lugeda, mitte kõige parem aga halb ka ei ole. Väga rõõmus
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PostitaminePealkiri: Re: W.C aka Winged Creatures   W.C aka Winged Creatures Icon_minitimeNelj Jan 07 2010, 20:00

norm, võiks rohkeb tegevustikku olla.Väga rõõmus
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PostitaminePealkiri: Re: W.C aka Winged Creatures   W.C aka Winged Creatures Icon_minitimeNelj Jan 07 2010, 21:11

Igav, kirjavigu on palju, segane ja tevustikku on vähe.
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